Abigail Turns One

A day that at one point I feared might never arrive...Abby's first birthday. We were surrounded by friends and family, 36" pizza, root beer, red velvet and strawberry cupcakes and a candy bar with enough gummies to stop a three year olds heart. It was the best!





Abby's birthday started off as the windiest day Pasadena has seen all year. Thankfully, it made the balloons go crazy which was lots of fun!



Abby started off the day crawling around with some of her pals, Luke and Lily...



And decided that Lily's hat was really awesome.



So awesome, that she wanted to give Lily a kiss. What is it with Abby attacking (open mouth kissing!) other babies?







She got her own strawberry cupcake from Violets (quite a way to introduce dairy and sugar!) but was really much more interested in the bubbles.





And her friend Pema is much more interested in Grant.



And by the end, she was done. She slept 13 hours that night.




Thank you to the friends and family who made Abigail's birthday so special. We are now in sugar comas, recovering.

Smoke & Mirrors

While I scurry around, trying to get things done for Abigail's first birthday, she's scurrying around, too. While I have my back turned, here are some of her favorite past times.

1. Putting all of her little socks in a bag, shaking it with all her might and then taking them out one by one. It's a real red letter day if I let her shake (to the music) and suck on her teething tablets bottle. (i know... not the best idea).





2. Pulling as many tights and pants out of this bin as she can as well as pull all of the books off the shelf.





3. Escape around the corner into my bedroom. Then attack my closet. And close the door and disappear behind it.





4. The mirror is behind the door. Looking at herself followed by kissing herself and then a "who, me?" look is a new favorite.

A New Booky Tradition

For Abigail's birthday (and for every one that follows...) we plan to give her a classic book. By the time she gets married, hopefully, she'll have the beginnings of a wonderful library. And, she won't be able to make any money selling them (If, let's say, she wanted to completely defy us and do what I did and drive across the country after college. For fun. With another girl. Only one other girl. For over a month. With nothing but a AAA trip-tick and a cell phone the size of a loaf of bread. But she wouldn't do that. Would she?) because we are going to write our birthday wishes (and overall hopes and dreams for her) in each and every one. This year, to kick things off, we got her Alice In Wonderland. Thankfully, Penguin has come out with these beautiful new covers.



Let the collecting begin!

Music

Every Tuesday morning, we have music class. It's truly a magic music class. Abby gets to play instruments, bang on drums, shake shakers, dance around the room....it's a 45 minute but seemingly never ending mountain of fun. The best part is that Tamara and Grace do it with us.



The second best part is that when we play the CD from music class, it's like hitting a reset button (as Tamara says) in Abby's brain. All that was wrong, the tooth ache, the stubbed toe...is gone and the music is playing and she's rocking out.

Abby has gotten more and more adventurous with each passing class. Last week she spent most of her time almost in the teacher's lap. I am so thrilled that Abby isn't (yet!) how I was... apparently shyly behind my mother for the first four years of my life and terrified of men. I think I actually saw her flirt with the young man at Trader Joe's today during check out when he said, "What beautiful eyes you have, Abby." She batted those long Heatherly lashes and grinned. We might be in trouble....

Photo Blocks

A few new things that our almost 12 month old is doing these days... She now loves to snuggle. Granted it's only for about 10 seconds, but for those lovely 10 seconds when she puts her head on your shoulder and sighs, heaven on earth exists. She is also speaking her own language now and then looking up at us after she asks an incoherent question as if to say, "am i right?" She's crawling everywhere, discovering the doggie door (and all that lies on the other side),



and is totally into these blocks that i bought on etsy. They have pictures of our family on them and she loves for me to sit with her and tell her who's who.



I leave them up on our mantle (for now, out of her reach!) and she pops up and down, pointing and screeching for me to get them down. They're heavy, they're a little sharp -- but she's a daredevil. What can I say?

Stranger Love

Our just over 16 pound girl is almost a year old. I know. I can't believe it. And yet, this past year feels both extremely fast and at the same time, like the longest year of my life. I love this year for both of those reasons. Over and over again, dreams kept coming true. God has been so faithful to us.

This week, Abby fell in love with a few strangers. When I went to UPS to send a package, the nice lady behind the counter brought her brown-uniformed self around to the front and held Abby while I filled out the paperwork. Abby loved it. Then again, she was wearing quite a bit of bling around her neck to keep Abby focused.

We also went to a book signing for our friend Gar.



She met a few new people that day but fell in love with Kelly, whom she'd never met before. She's drumming on her "drum" of water here, looking a little kooky, but very happy.

And finally, we went to a wedding on Sunday night and had lovely Maria come over to babysit. Abby had met her for all of about five minutes previously. We scooted out the door and heard that she played, jumped and laughed for most of the afternoon. Whew! We are one step closer to taking the leap of leaving for four whole days when we go to New York. Two weeks and counting!

Bye-bye Scale

My lactation consultant had mercy on us before Abby's surgery and loaned us a scale. We needed one that showed weight gain in ounces and tenths of ounces. She knew we needed every bit of encouragement we could get. It's remained (to Grant's chagrin) a centerpiece in our dining room since then. Here's a picture with me and Abby standing in our dining room and you can just barely see it behind us.

But today, we gave it back. I haven't put Abby on it in a few weeks actually. She's eating so well that I haven't needed to. Hows that for progress?

As my lactation consultant was leaving, she asked me when Abby got diagnosed. "On day 5 of her life", I said. She sighed, and told me about a baby she was working with recently who wasn't gaining weight and wasn't diagnosed with a heart defect until she was 3 months old. She had surgery at 4 months (like Abby) and didn't make it. She was too weak to handle the surgery. Do I need to explain that the flood of fears came roaring back? It actually solidified in my mind, this far after the fact, that my fears for our frail little girl even making it through surgery were founded. It happens. But by the grace of God, not to us. Not to her. Thank you, God.

Mariachi Bands and Chinese Tutus

Last weekend we went to El Cholo for dinner (Waahoo! It's Green Corn Tamale season!). Abby's favorite part was watching the Mariachi Band up on the balcony. Her daddy even lifted her up, in her highchair, swaying back and forth. It's no wonder she loved it. Even at home, when the annoying little song from her toy starts singing the ABCs, she shakes her rattle to the beat.

It was also her friend Pema's birthday. Happy Birthday Pema!




It was a Chinese theme and Abby was intrigued by Pema's awesome shirt and tutu. So much that she attacked her in this play by play :

I wasn't terribly worried about Pema seeing that she outweighs Abby by about 10 pounds. She's the weight Abby dreams she could be!

And here is Pema flirting with Grant and Abby looking over.... not so sure about sharing him....

Abby's first friend's birthday party was a big success (i mean, there were balloons for her to play with, after all!). Now it's time to prep for hers!

Mother's Day Recap

How did it go? Lovely church service (spent some time in the nursing mom's room where Abby kept all the little babies awake with her chatting, and we met another Abby), impromptu lunch in the park with food from one of our favorite, local spots with some dear friends, the Pams!

Thanks to JJ for the circa 70s dress for Abby that you wore (so special!)...and to Mackenzie for watching Abby while we ate.

It was the most wonderful day. That's not only because Grant brought me a ragingly good fully leaded cappuccino, a croissant, a bevy of beautiful flowers and got up early with Abby.... but because there are three of us now, all with whole, happy hearts.

Being Close

I was driving around yesterday with a baby doll in my lap, kid music blasting from the stereo, a diaper bag filled with "big girl" snacks and a "whoozit" at the ready in case Abby got fussy. There I was, at a red light, when it dawned on me that Mother's Day was Sunday. I didn't, not for one second, think - "How did i get here? How do I know what a whoozit is?" Probably because I know exactly how I got here. It took numerous years, numerous fertility treatments and numerous pennies. I know exactly how many of each of these things it precisely took. And, I can actually say, that I would not change a single thing about those facts.

My timing was certainly not God's timing when it came to having a child. But after lots of fighting it, my timing did become His timing. And as anyone who wants something really badly knows, once you submit and let it go, whatever will be will be. You're actually okay with it at that point because all of the fighting it has worn you out. Which is exactly where God wanted me. Worn out, tired of doing it on my own and willing to take what He gives. (Which, by the way, is always good, even if it doesn't seem so when your baby gets diagnosed with a heart defect.) She was certainly worth waiting for. Any child is worth the wait, of course. But I am so thankful that I'm able to say that, especially considering the first 4 months of Abigail's life, riddled with fear, denial, living minute by minute, feeding to sometimes tearful feeding... because looking back, God was close. Ever so close. So that when I start to drift, and take things for granted again (our health, my husband, our happy child, the ability to pay our bills...) you actually miss that closeness. And back I run. Just in time for Mother's Day.

Which brings me to the thing I'm most excited for on Mother's Day. We are, for the first time since having Abigail, barring something unknown, going to church. Not on our couch, hearing the sermon live, as we've done almost every Sunday -- but in the actual building. And I can't wait.

I'm not sure how it's going to go with Abby. I do know she won't be wearing her Guess jeans (although they are awfully cute) that Grandma N. bought her.... (it's an occasion deserving of a dress, right?)




But I do know she won't be able to crawl around the corner and do this, mid-sermon...


Happy Mother's Day everyone. Mine already feels special.

"I Love The Park" Fan Club

Remember Fan Clubs? The real kind. The kind that existed long ago, in the eighties, where you had to actually pen a letter to join and sign an agreement that you'd be a member. I think you actually got an official sticker or something. At least, that's what Shawn Cassidy's people said back then. Well, if they had them today, Abby would be a big fan of going to the park. It's one of her favorite things to do -- and here she is with two pals, Pema and Emme. There's a good chance I'll have to get all of my friends -- I mean, Abby's friends-- together for a group play date. I can't wait till they are old enough for "ice cream Fridays". (we'll make it coconut ice cream for you, Pema!)